Ugh

Well that is the only word for it today. I feel shit, not ill just shit. I am miserable, can't stop crying, have got so much going on and am struggling to cope at the minute. Family is falling apart around me, I'm exhausted trying to do my degree and work full time. I don't want to be here today, I want to be on a dessert island on my own where no one can make me cry or hurt me :( fooling hate families, one of the reasons me and Mark have no wedding plans, in our families marriage is just a joke, why ruin what we have!
Grrr sorry I needed that vent.
On a happier note, I've not binged with the upset, I've eaten normal, although Mark has just treated me to a mug of tea and a peanut butter kit kat, that's good though considering what I normally get like!

I am on half term for a week now, hoping to get some rest but have got lots planned, visit over to Granny, cinema with brother, a massive clean at home, want to get the nets and curtains washed and the carpets cleaned! Going to see my bestie for a cuppa too at some point.
Tomorrow I am going into school to be an extra in a new comedy drama being filmed called Love and Marriage with Alison Steadman and Larry Lamb, I'll be honest the money definitely sold it to me! Although with the way I am feeling tonight I don't think my sad puffy face will be a good 'extra!'

This afternoon me and Marky planted some of our flowers in the indoor greenhouse to start them off for spring. We've started with marigolds, foxglove, poppy, sweet pea, and petunias. Herbs we've started are dill, tarragon, coriander, mint and basil. Love planting in the garden :)

Catch up!

Well thanks to Uni work, school work and jewellery making I have been snowed under with business and unfortunately no time to blog. Yesterday I submitted my 3rd assignment of this year, two left to finish this year now and I am on the final countdown!
I started a Facebook page for my handmade jewellery yesterday, at long last. Have a peek, www.facebook.com/HamdmadeJewelleryByCarlaLouise
I am also trying to set up an Etsy shop, all obviously taking it's time!

Well, I knew it would happen, inevitable really, I've binged again, for the last week or so, biscuits have crept back in, chocolate bars, Grrr so annoyed with myself but this is me, I have no will power and binge so damn easily. My meals have been spot on, exercise has been good but them bloody chocolate cravings have beat me again, so annoyed with myself but think I am sorted again now, hopefully anyway.

Next week is half term from work and I have big plans to get back on track 100%. I think a big factor in my binge has been the miserable cold,snowy weather, Uni work piling up, tiredness, and feeling run down. I can not wait for half term, I've got no Uni work to cram in, a dinner date with my girl friends, cleaning the carpets and a massive cleaning session in the house, and a bloody good rest!!

Whoops! Slacking a little!

Slacked a little with posting this week. It's been a busy one with lots of Uni work, jewellery making and lots of snow! 

I'm really enjoying this block of Uni work, observing children's English and reading different children's literature, really quite interesting. 

I have made some gorgeous new rings this week and have also completed lots of new jewellery orders :) next weekend I'm hitting the suppliers for new clay and materials and I cant't wait! 

Snow has covered the city and its looking beautiful, I left school early on Friday as kids started being collected early so just the heads stayed behind and let all other staff go home. Roads were mental and my dad followed me home because I was so scared but I made it in one piece and then me, Marky and Bobaroo went outside to play in the snow! Love it! 

Its's still looking beautiful and snowy outdoors, albeit very dangerous on the hill we live in the middle of, the car is trapped on the drive and I've seen countless cars slide down the hill and get stuck going up the hill today. I hope common sense prevails with my school and we can be allowed to stay safely at home tomorrow rather than risk lives by being forced to drive in. 

I've successfully completed week 2 of the C25K which I am still enjoying, grateful for the weekend off though as I have a rotten cold started, I am drinking honey and lemon lots and have made a giant pot of red lentil soup with carrots and onions which is immense, just had a little bowl now while waiting for our roast chicken dinner to cook :) 

I hope to return to regular posting this week! 
Ooh meals, forgot that part, this weeks meals are : 

• tuna pasta bake 
• Chicken breast wrapped in bacon
• Chicken and mushroom bake with carrot and swede
• Beef casserole 
• Roast dinner (of course!) 

            

Back in a routine

Evening! 
Well what a busy weekend here. Yesterday I popped to town with mom, got a gorgeous pair of boots from a charity shop, absolute bargain! I love charity shops, love a good bargain and nice to know I have helped a charity at the same time :)  In the afternoon I sat and did 4 hours Uni work without a break, I really felt like I had made good progress with this English block and am now 2 weeks ahead of schedule, hoping to get my assignment written over the next two weeks, then two more assignments and that's this year complete :) 
I also spent a few pennies online shopping for new jewellery making pieces, I have got some gorgeous bits on their way to me, can't wait! 

Marky cooked last night, he made Swedish meatballs with mustard mash, absobloominlutely scrummy! I love his home made recipe, he really needs to make a book of all the amazing foods he can cook!

Today I have had another busy day, nice little lye in with my Bobaroo, Mark is on the sofa because I've got this dry hacking cough keeping us awake. I made poached eggs and bacon for breakfast and then got cracking on the ironing. Popped to the shops for a few bits I forgot to get with the big food shop, there's always something isn't there! 
We have had a roast beef Sunday dinner which was immense and I have completely gutted the house with cleaning, I now feel like we are back in a routine of work and housework so I think this week will be a lot more settled with everything. 

I watched the first episode of Mr Selfridge earlier so am looking forward to that tonight and also Glee! My Sunday routine is back to normal :) 

Tomorrow is work and Uni work, I am planning chicken jalfrezi for dinner, recipe from the hairy dieters book and will start week 2 of the C25K app! 

Feeling positive for a good week ahead. X

Back to it!

Evening! Well it's been a few days since I blogged, but they have been productive days :) 
Had an inset day at work on Tuesday before the kids came back on Wednesday. I always hate going back after the holidays but do enjoy catching up with everyone and also oddly getting back into a routine. 
I have done my first 3 days of the C25K app which I am really enjoying, struggled slightly because I have this damn hacking cough settling down onto my chest but have just breathed through it!! 
Food wise, I have cooked as soon as I have got home from school so there has been no temptation to snack. Meals this week have been: 
a bacon and egg breakfast dinner
Cottage pie with carrot and swede mash
Cajun chicken with BBQ sweet potato wedges, and, 
Chilli

I have been busy being back in school with my Uni work, observations and lots of English work to be started, I have made a huge start on this block of work, worked my socks off every break time and evening! I will nail this assignment!

I have also completed my job application and sent it off, eeek! I really hope I get an interview, I would love this opportunity so fingers are crossed in this house!

This weekend it is forecast to snow, I love the snow but not sure I can be bothered with it this year, I am desperate for spring to happen now, want to get planting in the garden again, it always looks so miserable in winter :( 

A busy Uni work weekend planned but I will make time to blog any progress. 
Oh also, I am getting the pedometer back out to see how many steps I do a day, 10,000 daily recommendation, can't imagine I do that even with my mental busy days at school and home! Watch this space!!

Monday!

Final chance of a rest today before being back at school tomorrow for inset day and then the kiddies back in on Wednesday. The holidays have gone so fast, if only the school days went as fast!!

Feeling a bit better today thankfully, hacking cough but I'm drinking lots of water.
Today I have given my bum a kick and got back into a healthy routine properly. I haven't ran since October so decided to start again with the help of the C25K app, wow I can't believe how hard it was getting back into it, proof that it can't just be a fad that is taken up and dropped!!
Omlette for breakfast and I've just had some more of the amazing 'souper soup' I made on Friday, so much still in the freezer too! Tonight for dinner I am making Cajun chicken, recipe from the Hairy Dieters book. I am looking forward to making that, love the smell of Cajun spices :) 

Before I started back 100% this morning I did my measurements and weight, thankfully I haven't gained anything over Christmas, I have a sickness bug to thank for that! I also haven't gained any extra inches since the last inches check in October, slightly annoyed that I've been so slack since then but with family, friends, Uni, work life has just been a bit manic, annoying but sometimes these things happen and the important thing is that I know where I go wrong and what my downfalls are, the hard part is getting back on the wagon and now I am back on it I intend to stay on it :) 

Bleurgh

I had big plans to get up this morning, get my ass on the treadmill and go outside to wash the car, so far I have sat on the sofa wrapped up with hot drinks feeling like death. I have got a horrible sore throat, aching head and neck all across my shoulders :( feel just bleurgh! 

So there goes today's plans, I have got the pork in the oven and my Uni work around me, think we are going to watch Rock of Ages on DVD and just have a rest. Mark has made me a drambuie toddy drink, alcohol at this time is a shock but my gosh it is amazing, and of course medicinal! 

Hoping to feel better in a few hours :) 

Evening!

Have been watching the Old Skool CITV weekend today, absolutely loving all the old shows, especially the Raggy Dolls and the Press Gang!
Said to Mark at 5:30 ,after far too long watching telly, that I was going to rest my eyes for 10 minutes, well two hours later I woke up! Dinner wasn't prepared at all so I had to get cracking on a late meal. I made chicken chasseur tonight from the new Slimming World magazine insert, it was absolutely divine! We both loved it, it says to cook for an hour but ours was ready in about 30 mins which was great! We also had some more of Kate's super soup for lunch today, I am loving that soup :)

I popped to the shops this afternoon to pick up our neice Isobel's birthday present, 3 on Monday, absolute beaut she is. We got her the Rapunzel dress, to alternate with the Cinderella one we got her for Christmas which she doesn't like to take off! Love how into the fancy dress she is, just like me! Love a fancy dress party!!

I have also been and bought a joint of pork for tomorrows dinner, I love a Sunday roast and we haven't had one in a while with a busy December so tomorrow I am doing roast pork with all the (healthy) trimmings, I can't wait, I hope it lives up to my expectations, I get annoyed when food lets me down!!!!

Had some new jewellery orders placed today too which is fantastic, I thought things would be a little quiet seeing as we all struggle in January so it was definitely a surprise :)

I did it, I passed!!!

I won't lie, I was so scared to open the email I received today, it was from my tutor and it was my maths assignment score and feedback, this assignment is worth 50% of the whole year so it needed to be good, downside is that I have dyscalculia to I was literally tearing my hair out to get it done to a decent standard! anyhow I opened the email and i absolutely smashed it!! I was absolutely thrilled to get the score that I did and it has given me a massive confidence boost, woop! take that Mr Brittain and Mr Rice who both told me I was thick! They wouldn't believe I was studying to be a teacher now if I told them, pair of twats!! 
So with that little confidence boost I have got out my next block of work to start on already, I am looking forward to this block, English, my favourite subject and one I feel is getting left behind a little.

 I have also been very brave tonight and started an application to another school, I will be able to complete my teaching degree there and it's also a lot more money which is always a bonus isn't it! 
I am not great with application forms, I can't sell myself at all which is blooming annoying as I can do my job with my eyes closed, I am over qualified for the roles I do and yet I love everything about what I do! My job is hard, stressful, with an awful workload and yet it is one of the most rewarding jobs to have and I am damn good at it, I have great time keeping, fantastic people skills, I work my ass off and I basically 'get on with it'. Now give me the job please!! 
I am about to tweet a lovely lady I know for some tips :) Carole this is you!


I have also been a busy girlie today, I made an awesome soup this morningand froze loads ready for school next week, lentilsm carrots, onions - simple but amazing. Thanks to Kate for that recipe!
Mark got home from work at 12 (half day friday) we then took apart his laptop (dangerous stuff!) to clean the fan, it was absolutely frigging disgustingly filthy with muck!! but now it is running better and Marks' tantrums can stop! 
I then finished, finally, relaying the last of the laminate floor in our back spare bedroom which is where all our exercise equipment lives, my back i breaking but its finished and the equipment is all set up again, yay I can get back on my bike and treadmill! Mark says he is determined to teach me how to use the rowing machine properly this year, haha no chance Marky! I am hopeless, I have no co ordination on the rower and basically just sit on it in hystercs the whole time! I'll stick to what I know! 

I had an awful sleep last night,worrying about assignment score and Bobcat took up most of the bed so I couldn't get comfy, tonight I plan on having some warm milk and getting into bed to read some more of the 'Life of Pi' book I downloaded last night, struggling to get into it but think i'm getting there :) 

Tomorrow my ass is getting back on the treadmill before breakfast, my head is in the game and I have got a timetable pinned up in the 'gym' room. Let's do this!

What day is it?!

I love my holidays from work but I am getting a little forgetful as to what day it is!! 
Yesterday I went to my Granny's where I kept correcting her on the right day, only I was convinced it was Wednesday not Thursday! My wonderful Granny with her famous 'chubby cheek' comment was discussing Christmas presents with me, I asked her for new pyjamas this year, can't have enough pj's in my opinion! She asked me a few weeks back what size she needed to buy so I said 12's or if they're a double size then 10-12. So yesterday we were talking pyjamas, I told her how comfy they were and that I was needing a clear out of my 'fat pyjamas' because they are far too big these days but sometimes I still like to wear them when it's cold and I double pj's up, to which she said, "oh Carla, don't get rid of the fat pyjamas, you might need them again one day" cheeky buggar! The issue is that my auntie who is disgustingly obese, wears clothes that show every roll of fat she has accumulated and  eats like an absolute pig, my mom is her sisters complete opposite and eats like a bird! For some reason there is an issue that my fat auntie can't lose any weight, although she's always on an apparent diet, my mother is slim and I've lost loads of weight! Clearly not good enough! 
I am not built like anyone on my moms side of the family, well I guess I have my Granny's height and broad shoulders but I am built like my Dads side of the family definitely, I look like no one but body shape I am exactly like my Grandma, big boobs, broad shoulders, etc, Grandma is a yo-yo dieter according to my Mom. I adore my Granny but it does annoy me that because my obese auntie can't shift any weight and has a fat unhealthy lifestyle it means that I can't either! I have never been overweight always just a little podge luckily but family seems to dislike this! Grrrr little rant over!

Meals

Whoops! Nearly forgot again to post our meal plan for this week! Hopeless!
Breakfast in our house never really changes, Mark has cereal or toast and i have a fruit smoothie or a plain egg omlette. Weekends is time for bacon and egg :)
Lunches are simple too, either left overs from the previous nights dinner (I love leftovers!) or I roast a bit of veg and a chicken breast to take to work.
Tonight for dinner we have had bangers and mash-yum! A definite favourite of ours, carrot and swede mash for me tonight, I don't eat potatoes too often as they can make me feel a little rough!
Tomorrow I have promised Mark I will go to the butcher and get steak for dinner, to have with peas, mushrooms, sweet potato wedges and corn.
Other dinners on the menu over the next week are, cottage pie, chilli, roast pork, chicken chasseur and cheesy broccoli and potato bake. 

Happy New Year!

New Years Eve turned out to be an unexpected late night after all, I have never watched Jools Holland but because Paloma Faith was on I had to watch it and then over to the good old music channels for their NYE party tunes, ended up staying up til 4am giggling and dancing around the front room with Marky! I was also sober too might I add, I am am awful drinker so tend to just not bother. I don't cope with headaches, or that hangover tiredness one bit, I'd rather not have anymore than a couple of celebratory glasses :) 
So yesterday I was supposed to pop on my meal plans for the next week but due to my impromptu late night, I got up at 10:30 and then spent the next 5 hours scrubbing our house clean of Christmas decs, washing bed linen, everything I like to do on Jan 1st to start the year clean, home and lifestyle :) I made a bacon and egg late breakfast and then a huge pot of bolognese for dinner, to last today too, can't go wrong with leftovers in my opinion! Bolognese was scrummy, mince, onion, garlic, oregano, aubergine,  courgette, mushrooms, chopped tomatoes -Delish! 

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Today, Marky has got up and gone back to work :( I absolutely hate it when our holidays together are over, we aren't soppy romantic in the slightest and we don't do things together everyday but I just love having him at home with me and not having to worry that he will sleep through his damn work alarm which wakes me up more than him! 
My plan today was to definitely not be up this early but it was inevitable I would be, although still lying in bed!! I will remember to post my meal plans at some point this morning! I also plan to scrub out the back spare room, which is our exercise equipment room, it needs a good reorganising and is driving me mental! I'm sure Bob cat will help me, he loves that room!
The bins are out so I am big time hoping the bin men are back to work because our recycling bin is overflowing. Bob cat has just jumped on the bed after his early morning run over in the school field so hopefully now we will fall asleep for another couple of hours :)